I have this dream- a dream that makes my heart bleed, brings tears to my eyes, and makes me want to jump up and do everything I can to reach it. Everything within me is screaming at me to reach this goal, and to give everything I can to make it happen. I don’t know if you have something that you are just so passionate about that you cant help but feel as though your heart bleeds for it? It took me quite a while, a long journey, and lots of experimental pieces to reach the point where I finally realized what it is I can not stand to live without. I never set out to have this passion, nor did I pick this path for myself. I never dreamed I would decide or discover to spend my life pursuing this goal, in fact it is just as a surprise to me now as it would have been years ago. Yet, at the same time, it is not a surprise at all. The pieces all just naturally came together and I had no idea until later…much later.
I started out by just being a volunteer in an organization that was impacting my life-my church. Little did I know that this small decision to give of myself and my time, would have a lasting impact on what I would decide to spend my life doing. I simply had the mindset of, if this place and group of people are doing so much for me, I can not be selfish and not do my part by giving back. It just made sense. I started small, and ended up falling in love with it..volunteering, that is. I couldn’t stop. I just kept giving, and giving and loved every second of it.
In addition to my love for volunteering, I have always been fond of the arts. Initially with performing arts, moving to photography, then design, web and video. I went to art school to pursue being a brand identity developer, and had no idea that the decision to pursue an education in the arts would continue to spark my love for my true passion. I thought that I would for sure end up in a design firm or a marketing department. I was beyond clueless that my life would go a different direction.
It was during school and while volunteering that I discovered events. It just sort of happened to me, fell into my lap, and was like a knock at my door. I had no intention of loving them, no intention of longing for them, and certainly no intention of putting on events for the rest of my life. Yet, I found myself putting on events on a regular basis, and LOVING every single second of it. It wasn’t until my final year of college that it all clicked for me. I need to pursue a career in event coordination.
I then set out to get a job in the event field. Anywhere. With anyone. It didn’t matter, as long as I was coordinating events. I spent months searching and interviewing. It wasn’t until there was a company that was interested in me, and I went through their 5 interviews, and they turned me down because they were an insurance company and told me I wouldn’t be happy there because clearly my heart longs to be in non-profits that I actually understood. I won’t be happy just putting on events. I deeply long to put on events for meaningful organizations. It was then that I really understood myself and my heart. I had spent all that time thinking it was events I loved, when really it is not JUST events. I long to make a lasting impact on the world, to make people’s lives better, to leave this world knowing that I did everything I could to make other’s feel loved, cared for, educated and provided sustainability. I dream of putting on events that raise awareness, funds, and inspire. My heart bleeds for it, my tears are shed for it, and I will not rest until I reach my goal.
It was not a straight shot to understanding and realizing this dream, and it most certainly has not been a straight shot reaching it. However, I plan to continue down this journey, learning and growing with every opportunity, and moving closer each day. I want to work hard, give of myself and my time, and reach my goals.
What is it that your heart bleeds for? What sort of dreams and goals do you have for yourself? Were you aware of it since you were young, or did you grow into it? I’d love to hear from you!